Monday, March 30, 2009


Yvette Acuna

Friends know that most recently a really good friend of mine passed away. It hit me pretty hard for many reasons.... and I hope to explain a few...

My Myspace post :

"This morning Vett passed away. 2:24 am may stick in my mind for a while, everytime the clock ticks to it, I might get a little sad. But my memories of her will last forever.

There has been very few people in my life that have helped mold who I am... Most were from negative influences. Vett was for one of the first times in my life a very postive one. I owe most of the credit of my sobriety to her. In some way she was sort of my angel, guiding me back to where I needed to be.

She helped me appriciate my life, my life that ill never take for granted again.

I love you Vett!"

When I first heard Yvette was not going to make it much longer I decided that I needed to let her know how much she influenced me. I thought I'd send her a card with a note or something so that she could keep it by her bedside. It would be something that proved she was so much more then a wonderful mother, a great wife, and an awesome friend. It would show her she was most of all a beautiful person.

When I first met Yvette she was going through testing and I hadn't yet known what was wrong. We bonded quickly and I fell in love with her and her family. It was something out of the norm for me. I don't make friends often.

I can tell you that I have a lot of fun memories with Yvette, like how she passed out drunk while I was coloring her hair. But Yvette knows those were good times. What she never knew is that one time she had said to me "Your living the life I was supposed to live" This came shortly after her diagnosis. This came at a time Yvette was real sick and I suppose realising what would be instore for her future.

It also came at a time in my life, that I didn't really want to live. My life was had become so miserable, that I could no longer bare it, or so I thought.

Here was this person, absolutely amazed by me and my life, and here I was feeling sorry for myself. It just kind of hit me hard. Like a reality check. But on the other hand Yvette didn't know how much I admired her and her life.

She was living the life I always wanted. Her and her husband were in love and had 4 incredible children. To substain the love they all had for each other, made me envious. I just adored them all.

Even thrugh her sickness, Yvette proved how strong she was. We all watched her fight her way through the mess, and in a way I'm glad she has finally found true peace. Faced with what she delt with I don't know if I could of done the same... I would of fallen into a million tiny pieces. Through my eyes, she never showed fear, never let a frown upon her face, she never gave up.

They always say that life is short and you should tell the people around you that you love them. I was never an expressive person, I held all my emotions inside. But if anyone had ever deserved my love, it was Yvette. I made sure she knew that I loved her. Which is very well another lesson I have learned from her.

Yvette always loved hearing my stories and my nights out on the town. One day she said to me "You should just write a book about your life" It became clear to me that that is exactly what I was to do.

I always hoped Yvette would have a chance to read it. I haven't finished it yet, but its a good thing that I hadn't. She will never have a chance to read it, but she did one better, she will now definately be a part of it, forever, and forever in my life.

Yvette Acuna... Cervical Cancer... Not a survivor.. But a FIGHTER.


Margaret said...

Hi Leesa,
I am new to your blog and this is my first read here. I feel really sorry for the great loss you are suffering from. Both you and Vett must be lucky to experience true friendship between yourselves. Do not get depressed. Memories will always stay.
Do keep in touch.

eternalvow7 said...

Hello Leesa,

Losing a friend is like losing a piece of yourself. I felt that hurt too and I'm deeply sorry for your loss. She is a great friend and thank you for sharing her life to us. I've looked up to this site from London counselling and they offer various counseling strategies on coping up. I hope this would be of help to you. All the best for you, dear. :)

Counselling Southampton said...

Loosing an important person in your life is indeed a tremendous one. But, the challenge of moving on is definitely a difficult job. Our counselors can help you in your journey out from your depression. Try to share your emotions to a counselor. And, you will surely fell better.