Wow...
To read back on my last posts is heartbreaking and nostalgic all at the same time. I've been through so much since then, but I still don't feel far enough away from misery yet.
Shortly after that my life consumed me, and now I am the product of life's regurgitation. Which explains why I haven't blogged in so long. I was literally lifeless for the last year or so.
3 great things happened meanwhile.
First.....
Rehab. I am proud to say I am a quitter. I am now 15 months sober. Haven't even swollowed 1 pain killer through 2 major surgeries.
Second...
I found GOD. The only reason I can think of why I am still here. Its not because of me... because I've tried to end it so many times. I can't explained how I've survived so I put it on someone who is also unexplanitory.
Third...
The birth of my son Andrew Charles.... whom I placed up for adoption.
Now that my head has seem to risen above the clouds (or smog.. I'm from so cal) I hope to blog about all 3 of those things soon.
Peace, Love, and Farts
2 comments:
hey, i dont know you, came across you blog by searching for rehab info.... well congrats on being sober, im trying to do the same, been on oxycontin now for 5 years, and this shit is so old, i even tried suboxone but i relapsed and i think i have a worse habit than before, then i was only doing like 2 to 3 40mg oc's a day now im up to 4 sometimes 5 a 80 mg oc's. i work just to support my habit :(. Its hard to explain to people my addiction, i usualy hear "well just stop taking them" or "hell, its just pills, its not like your on coke or herion". i wish it was. people dont understand how opiates affect you. well im sorry to bother you,but it makes me happy to see that you can overcome this disease and hopefully i will too! take care!
hi Mary!
tell those people to stop breathing. its just as hard. your body NEEDS that drug. it is not safe to detox alone.
unfortunately EVERY addict KNOWS they need help, there is just no help finacially.
I was finally blessed with an oppertunity to get clean and sober after struggling for years. Pills are the hardest. I went through my first pregnancy on them and hope it has no major outcome on my daughter =(
Ive learned that as an ADDICT i will always NEED and ABUSE something. Just find a healthy replacement.
People dont understand that Pills are herion and cocain, when metabolized. I am finally and completely pill free since 6/2010. Good Luck. Find the strength within yourself. You will never fall.
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